Things I Should Have Realized About Myself A Lot Earlier, Part I

When confronted with surprises/challenges/unexpectedly crowded rooms of people, I always choose flight over fight.

If I can't immediately make fun of my problems with my usual scorn and condescension, my brain throws up its hands with a helpless "nope," my temperature shoots up to nine hundred degrees, and I just turn tail and run away, figuratively hiding in my mother's skirts. 

This is why I didn't enjoy my surprise birthday party in high school. This is why I hate arriving late to class. This is why I dread making entrances I am unprepared for. This is why I avoid being the newcomer.


(...this is why I drink vodka shots before going to parties? #UncomfortableDiagnostics)

Job Search Woes

Jobs Applied To: 19

Jobs Officially Rejected From: 1

Jobs "Cancelled" Instead of Being Filled: 1

Jobs That, According to My Low-Level Research, Were Secretly Filled but About Which I Was Never Notified: 2

So This One Time, As Requested, I Updated My Blog (Brought To You By the Word "Procrastination" and the Number "11:37 PM")

I am more than content; I am happy.

These are good months; I don't want them to end.

I suprise myself; he takes my surprises in stride.

Semicolons are useful; I like dashes a lot too.

Unnecessary Things That Annoy Me Unnecessarily

• Ugg boots
• Class rings
• Cardboard sleeves for hot beverages
• Pennies
• Leaf blowers
• Solid hand soap